1.  One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed,

 
2.  One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs changing,

 
3.  One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb,

 
4.  One to tell the nations of the world that they are either for changing the light bulb

     or for darkness,

 
5.  One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb,

 
6.  One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder

     under the banner "Light Bulb Change Accomplished",

 
7.  One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting details of how Bush

     was literally "in the dark",

 
8.  One to viciously smear #7,

 
9.  One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong

     light-bulb-changing policy all along,

 
10.  And finally one to confuse Americans about the difference between

      screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.